To strive but then it slips

To Stive
but then it slips
Just when I thought I grasped it

Critical thoughts break loose 
within and without
I reduce

So why now, when I had thought to be striving
I’m straight back to perpetual diving
Universe, I’m barely surviving

Out of mouths
spout doubt
& fears I could do without

So is this what’s coming my way,
Some debt I’ve refused to pay?

won’t leave
until it’s collected
Flashing lights because they keep getting disconnected

Never see it coming
it’ll pass, it’ll leave
Replaced by something

Better or worse
couldn’t say

it’s unknown
tomorrow, today 

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